?? Family ??

Family- What is that?
Home- What is that?
Family, that place in your heart where you can pick up the phone and call mom or dad, brother and sister and say "Hi Mom, Can I get that cookie recipe from you?"  "Hey Dad, Did you see that home run I hit today?"  "Hey Bro. What time are you coming over for the game?" "Hey Sis. I love mom but today she is on my ever living nerve!"  Ha Ha

Home, that relaxed and comfortable place, where you are in harmony with the surroundings! Ahh- I can't wait to get there and lay on the couch and veg.  Ahh- I can't wait to crawl in bed.  Ahh- I can't wait to just chill in front of the T.V.

Oh for all those years my heart would pant, and yearn with such intense eagerness. Did I say "Years?"  More honestly My entire life-How my heart has panted for that my entire life!

What would be my ideal,"normal,"family and home life look like, and feel like?  What I have right now!
A place where my kids love to hang, a place they prefer to be at rather than anywhere else. Movies, games, pizza-LOTS of pizza, snuggling, talking, sharing, Dad coming home after a long day of work and just wants to sit down and stay at home, and Mom, well I've been in these 4 walls all day, all week....... my head says "Get Outta Here before you blow!"and my heart feels like I just want to sit and hang with them.

Our Family- Sharing good times, bearing hard times.
Trusting (oh why does this have to be so hard) in God to show us the way...
Laughing and living, trusting, forgiving (lots of hugs and kisses-because of so many bumps and bruises, mistakes, selective hearing,  and plenty of miscommunication),
together in love, side by side, day by day.

Ironically (if you were raised like I was) when I looked up the word family, in the Webster's Dictionary, I have to say there were some definitions that struck me quite, well- let me say "Real."
(My emphesis added)
-a people or group of peoples regarded as deriving from a common stock,(pertaining to race) I on the other hand took it a different way-Hence one of the reasons" I am the way I am."

-a group of people united( ? ) by certain convictions or a common affiliation.
Which then I stumbled across:
- a group of individuals tracing descent from a common ancestor; especially : such a group of persons whose common ancestor is regarded as its founder.

Which then led me to:
Pedigree (No Not Dogs)
- the origin and the history of something.
And then finally:
-an account of the descent of a person, family, or group...

I finally had a way, a definition to describe my family, my birth family.

Please don't get me wrong, I was told I was loved by my mom- through gifts, if I did good on my report card, if I met my quota for the month.
Feel love, know love, experience unconditional love.  Can't say so much.

One regret I do have in life ( I never told my dad I loved him!)  I wanted to so bad on my wedding day, when we had our daddy-daughter dance.  But I was so scared, what would he think? What would he say?  Believe me when I say this; I knew, that I knew, that my dad loved me.
I knew it everytime I got home from school, and he got home from work, and we would snuggle together on the couch, and watch Little House on the Prairie, and I would fall asleep to his tummy growling in my ear, waiting for supper.
I am fully convinced now that he would of said, " I love you too, Melissa."  (He would of used my name, Dad never called people by there names, he would just start to talk.)
So now I say, "I Love You!"  to well;  Whomever I feel love towards, as often as the feeling comes,  as long as I have a voice, and as long as I have emotions.

My family was not united; we were divided, but I didn't know that growing up!
 My family life was "normal."  It's what I knew, it's what I breathed, it's what I was taught, it was "THE TRUTH."  We all carried a common affiliation, always felt, well--  like common stock.  Not even a good stock.
You see if I didn't dress quite right, or do my hair just right, or if my talk wasn't loud enough, or if my gestures were hidden, if I didn't meet my required hours for the week or month, if I wasn't a Jehovah's Witness I would be considered wordly and well-  living and belonging to Satan. A sinner (no not me, I was A Jehovah's Witness.) And if I didn't follow the "common stock", I would not live on a new paradise earth. (a language I know some of you reading understand) I was just that  common stock.

For me I think that maybe my family was more less designed, formed, and shaped from the history of something...,Lies. Deception. Manipulation, something only Satan could come up with. My lineage comes from a group of persons whose common ancestor is regarded as its founder-Charles Taze Russell.   

-That song by Sister Sledge- We Are Family-
"We are family, I got all my sisters and me."
My version would sound more like this "We are NOT family, I DON'T got all my sisters and well me-I'm ME. (MElissa)

You want to know what God's Truth tells me (oh, and guess what this isn't even the  half of it)
Rom. 8:7-9, 14-17, and 19 NLT (New Living Translation)
(emphasis added-mine)
7 For the sinful nature is always hostile to God.  It never did obey God's laws, and it never will.
8 That's why those who are still under the control of their sinful nature can never please God.
9 But you are not controlled by your sinful nature.  You are controlled by the Spirit if you have the Spirit of God living in you.  (And remember that those who do not have the Spirit of Christ living in them are not Christians at all.)
14 For all who are led by the Spirit of God are children of God.
15 So you should not be like cowering, fearful slaves. (Like we once were/ or maybe you still feel that way.-Here Comes the Truth - oh and to think this is just the start) You should behave instead like God's very own children, adopted into his family calling him "Father, dear Father."
16 For his Holy Spirit speaks to us deep in our hearts and tells us that we are God's children.
17 And since we are his children, we will share his treasures for everything God gives to his Son, Christ, is ours, too.  But if we are to share his glory. we must also share his suffering.
19 For all creation is waiting eagerly for that future day when God will reveal who his children (and family) really are.
        This is God's honest Truth to you too.
I know you've suffered, and I am so sorry for that. As long as we are on this earth, we will all suffer at different times and in different ways.  But honestly it is truly all worth it.  Because you will see if your willing to open the eyes of your heart, that

"You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives." Genesis 50:20 NIV (New International Version)
Faith- Let's build one on God's
           truth-God's Word.
Hope- There is always hope.
Love- To love is Christ,
           and He wants to give it to you,
           and His love is a love that
           will endure forever.

I'm thinking about You today, and praying for You today.